Friday, January 2, 2009

New Year's Resolutions

I have been doing alot of thinking lately about my New Year's Resolutions. I have always made resolutions, but at the end of the year, I think to myself "Why do you even bother." To be honest with you... I mean completely honest, it is hard for me to keep my resolutions and say at the end of the year that I stuck to it and completed the task. That is so embarrassing for me to say that, but it is the honest truth and I hate lying. I actually can't stand it when people lie to me and well quite frankly I don't trust liars. So, I am not going to sit here and lie to you and tell you that I make resolutions and stick to them til the end of the year.
So, with all of that being said.... I am not really sure that I am going to make "RESOLUTIONS" this year. Perhaps I can call it something else.... could I call it a goal, a task, a chore or should I just call it a year long errand (lol). Now that just sounds too funny if you ask me. Every year at this time, I sit down and make my list and about 2-3 weeks out, I am failing miserably and saying "oh heck with it" and then I just give up. I am definitely not one to give up and for me to give up so easily is just crazy. I mean who wants to be known as a failure!?! Certainly not me so I definitely need to get things in order and work something out where I will reach all of my goals and be successful at them..... for once!
My most famous goal that I write down every single year is to lose weight and well that isn't going to change this year. It will definitely stay on my list and hopefully I will lose some of this weight. Another goal of mine for this year is for my faith to become stronger. Once again, I will be completely honest and tell you that I love my God with all of my heart and soul, but I have not been a faithful servant and I am hoping and praying that with this New Year that I will have a new and fresh start and that my relationship with him will become stronger. I pray daily already and I give all the glory to God for everything that he has done for me and my family, but I guess that I just feel like there is something still missing. You see - awhile back, we went to a GREAT church. We were involved and really enjoyed the sermons and truly enjoyed the music. I at one point tried out for the choir, but was told that I didn't really have the voice. I guess the last thing that I really needed especially when I was just getting into the church, really starting to find my niche was to be told that I didn't have the voice to sing in the choir. I guess a part of me always thought that it wasn't about having the "perfect voice", but just about singing for God and making music that would more or less make God and his heart smile. I was told by the choir director that he would send me some music so I could practice and when it came time for try-outs again then I could be ready. Well, I waited and waited and my husband who was good enough for the choir even mentioned that I was still waiting on the music. Well, months and months later.... I was still waiting and never received a single bit of music. To be honest with you - it hurt and it crushed me and I think that was the straw that broke the camels back. It was months later that I quit going and haven't found the perfect church for us to attend yet. We have gone to so many churches and we either like the sermon, but are looking for something more in the music or we like the music and the sermon is lacking or well we don't like anything about the church. So, with the New Year we are hoping and praying that we find a church family and a church that we feel like we can call home. Don't get me wrong.... I know that there isn't a perfect church out there, but I feel very strongly that you have to feel comfortable when you walk in to church, you should feel welcome and you should really enjoy it and most importantly..... you should feel like you were fed God's word after you left. So, here is to praying to God that he will allow us to find the pretty close to perfect church and feel comfortable with our decision. I also want to continue to be the best wife to my husband that I can be and still continue to be the best Mom that Cameron could have ever asked for. Life isn't easy, but I know that if we keep God in the center of our world then everything will fall into place.
Hope you all have made your New Year's list and here is to hoping that you all can stick to it. Together I am sure we can accomplish everything!!

9 comments:

Amy B said...

Now that is a honest post. I could of written so much of what you just did.
Hey I do not think God cares how we sing..he just wants us to sing to him...
Shame on them for not allowing that. Their loss.

Kelly said...

This year my resolutions are being called Life Changes, bc each of them is something I want to continue long after 2009.
There may be no perfect church out there, but I am sure there is a perfect church for you out there. PJ and I looked and looked and looked before we landed where we are. And we LOVE it. The music is AWESOME and the sermons are ever more awesome than the music. I absolutely love our Pastor. He is human and plays from that. He does not pretend to be a super Christian just bc he is a minister. (does that make sense?)
I will pray for you to find that perfect fit.
You could always move a little closer to me and then attend my church. That would be SUPER!!! ;)
How about if we hold one another accoutable for our Life Changes this year? Sounds good to me.
I have never heard tell of try outs for a church choir. I agree with you...God loves ALL of our voices no matter what they sound like to us humans, all voices are music to his ears. Our church does not have a choir, we just have a praise team, a couple of them. Our church is very contemporary.

Brandi, Dan, L and B said...

I hope that I am not over stepping my boundries here but I seriously know without a doubt that the religion I belong to is 100 percent true. I belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. The thing I love most about my church is the fact that every single church in our religion practices the exact same thing and teaches the exact same thing. A bonus for you would be that anyone can join the choir. HA HA. I seriously invite you to maybe check out the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints by you or contact the missonaries because I truly believe that you will feel the spirit when you attend. One thing that I love so much about my church is the fact that we believe in eternal famalies and when we get married it isn't till death do you part it is for eternity. I know I want to be with my family for eternity. Hopefully I didn't over step the bounds of friendship by sharing my beliefs but I am truly passionate about Heavanly Father and my religion and just want to share it.

He & Me + 3 said...

I don't make resolutions...I always fail. But I do have some goals and a list. It is short but they are so important...Grow closer to the Lord daily, spend less, love pure, & give more.

Elaine at Matters of the Heart) said...

I am with you on the resolution front. I do not need to add anything to me already feeling guilty about not getting everything done.

I just ask God to direct my days and ask him to grow me into the women he wants me to be.

We searched hard for our church also, I pray you find your home...

McCrakensx4 said...

I have a hard time sticking to my resolutions, but like MiMi, I set goals that I think are attianable. I pray that you find a church where you feel you belong. It is hard but the reward is awesome! We belong to An Assembly Of God church and I love it...everything, the music, the sermon, the pastor, the people. Just be patient, He will guide you in the right direction.

Stacey said...

My resolutions this year are taking a differnt meaning in my mind too. I am thinking of them more as goals, because for me, setting goals is something that I can work on and are attainable. Goals allow you to set little steps along the way, as well as make you feel like you have achieved a small accomplishment and want to keep going. I too don't stick to my resolutions, so, therefore I had to come up with something else to get my mind going in the right direction and actually accomplish something I wanted to this year! :) Kudos to you. Honesty is the best policy, especially when I think about what I tell myself. Sometimes I can be so deceptive to myself, which is not a good thing. Hopefully this year will be much better.

I am so sorry to hear that someone who claims to be a Christian made you feel the way they did. That is simply awful. By no means do I think that made God smile, as I tell my little ones in Sunday school. I too have never heard of any church having tryouts for their choir. In fact, most churches would be elated to have someone ask to serve God in that way. For as long as I can remember, I have always been told to make a joyful noise to the Lord. I don't remember anyone saying that it had to be perfect. If that is were your heart is, then stick to it because God will make it happen. :) Kudos to you, and I am sure that you will find a place to sing to the Lord and shine a light out for others to see. :) I can just see it now, God smiling down because he hears your beautiful voice singing for His glory! WOW!!!!!!!

Lisa, I am so sure that you will find a perfect church for you and Shawn and Cameron. Scott and I did. It took a lot of prayer, but I truly believe that where we are now is where we are meant to be. From the moment that I walked through those doors and heard the pastor preach and then offer me a hug and not even know me, sealed it for me and I couldn't wait to go back next week. I just knew that there was a perfect place for us that would allow us to serve God with our talents, a place that fed us with God's word each week, and a place that we could enjoy getting to know and love a new church family. It will come, I know it. You are a wonderful Christian person and God is not going to let your dream of finding a church home and singing in the choir go. He is so amazing and will fulfill your heart beyond your heart's desire. :) He certainly did with Scott and I.

I am always praying for you guys, that's for sure. :) Thanks for sharing. I am always here for you, no matter what!!! :)

Love, hugs and blessings,
Stacey :)

Carly Marie said...

Lisa praying that you find your church that you guys need. Its a shame that they are run by humans sometimes!

God doesn't care if you sing like and angel or if you sing like a drowning cat.... all he cares about is that you sing for Him and to Him.

I want to also apologize for a comment I left a few days ago here...... I got my Lisa's mixed up..... lack of sleep does crazy things to you!

Love to you Lisa

Carly x

Lyndsay said...

That just goes to show you that words really can damage someone's spirit. I'm so sorry that happened to you. I don't think God cares if you can sing like Amy Grant or if you're totally off key (I'm sure you're not)...he just wants us to make a joyful noise.

I know exactly what you are going through since we left our old church and were searching just a short while ago. I'm so happy that we are back at our old church now. To just belong and be apart of a community of believers makes me feel so much better. I hope that you and your family truly find the "perfect" church for you and soon!!!

Oh yeah and my New Year's Resolution this year is to watch less TV and read more. So far I've been really good. I've finished Bring Up Boys and I'm onto Dare to Discipline and my husband and I are reading Heaven together.

Are you and your husband still doing the 40 day challenge from Fireproof? The movie is playing at the cheap theater in town and we were thinking about going to it.