Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Going Years Without Closure

As some of you might know..... I am a volunteer with RESOLVE (The National Infertility Association). I check messages for our HelpLine every week and tonight I received a call from a woman that has been dealing with infertility for years. Now when I say years..... I mean years. She is 72 years old and she really was tugging on my heart strings tonight. She called and left her name & number and I instantly thought that she had called the wrong number. I called her back and she expressed to me that she dealt with years and years of infertility and she was looking to talk to someone or anyone that could help her get some closure. She said that she sits and talks with her friends and they all talk about their own kids or grandkids and she doesn't have anything to talk about except her 2 cats. My heart just ached for this woman. I thought to myself that she is probably a very lonely person. I talked to her for some time and I realized that there are probably so many women out there that were never able to get pregnant. Now as they are older and hearing about all their friends and their children and grandchildren it makes it for a very difficult time for them. Can you imagine going all of those years without any closure? Can you imagine that she is probably so lonely and would probably give anything to share a story about her own child or grandchildren? I just can't imagine going so long without any closure and I guess that is why she really struck a chord with me tonight. I truly enjoy being a volunteer and helping others that have been in the same shoes as me. It is rewarding to know that I can give back something to others and know that I am helping them as they go through some of the same things that I went through. I remember when I went through fertility treatments..... all I wanted was someone that had been there before to talk to me and just tell me that everything that I was experiencing was normal, everything I was feeling was normal and everything that I couldn't control was normal. It is indeed a difficult time in ones life, but I truly can't imagine going 72 years without any closure. I could hear the hurt in her voice and I guess that is why this call touched me so much tonight. I pray that she will soon find closure, peace and be able to move on with her life. Have you ever crossed paths with someone and they touched your life? Well, tonight I experienced that with this lady. You never know why people are brought into your life, but I am a firm believer that things happen for a reason. I just hope that I was able to help her. I just hope and pray that she finds the peace that she needs.

6 comments:

Kahla said...

That is so heartbreaking, what a wonderful thing you do. I'm saying a prayer that she does find peace and closer.

Kelly said...

oh my Goodness. Wow...I can not imagine. My heart hearts for her as well.
My Gma is 83yrs old and she has NEVER been with out a child living in her house since she had my Dad (61 yrs ago)
I will keep this woman in my prayers. Maybe she will find a grandchild to "adopt".

McCrakensx4 said...

What a rewarding thing you are doing to help others and know what they are going through. I hope tonight you brought a little bit of warmth and peace into that sweet soul.

Brandi,Dan & Lukas said...

Oh my gosh that is so heart breaking. I am an only child and while Dan and I struggled with our fertility issues I kept thinking what if I never have children and something happens to Dan and my mom and step dad (my dad died when I was 12) I will be all alone and so lonely. I hope that this women can find some peace.

He And Me + 3 said...

That is awesome that you are able to help people in that way. I can't even imagine her pain or hurt. I pray that she does find closure & healing too.

2Erica2 said...

Similarly, my great aunt who passed away on Christmas Eve, never was able to have children. In her day, it was not as PC to adopt either, so she never did. When I first told her about my struggle and what I was going through, she, a woman who didn't ever cry, shed tears. She said, "ERica, you get a baby. Adopt, whatever, but don't lose this hope if you want one!" I know now that she is looking down on me as I begin my first successful pregnancy after IVF. I thought that dealing with infertility for two years was bad. I can't imagine a lifetime!