Thursday, July 31, 2008

Day 3 of CLOMID

Well, today was day 3 of clomid and I am doing remarkably well. It surprises me because when I was on the fertility drugs before - back in 2004 I had all sorts of side effects. Moodiness and hot flashes were my biggies!! Perhaps, it is the thought of knowing that I already have a little one to love and that makes it so much easier, but it really is nice knowing that the side effects aren't getting the best of me. Anyway, just wanted to give you all an update that things are going good so far. I will be sure to keep you all posted.

Oh, I also wanted to mention that I saw a good friend of mine the other day. Kelly is a gal which whom I worked with and she also went through IVF. Well, she is due to have a little boy on or around August 28th. I got to see ultrasound pictures and yep, it looks like he is gonna be a cutie!! I had no doubt that he would be cute..... Kelly is cute herself and well you ought to see her pregnant. She looks really cute with that baby belly : ) Anyway, I wanted to tell you that it was great seeing her and most importantly seeing that little belly of hers. She tried and tried for that little boy and finally on IVF #4 she got pregnant. So, once again don't give up on your dreams because they will come true. I will be sure to keep you posted on her story and when that handsome boy arrives!!

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Starting Clomid Today

Well, today is the day that I start Clomid. It is the 3rd day of my cycle and I will take the pills day 3-7. I am so nervous about starting the pills because last time I was on them they made me quite evil. I don't recall any other side effects except for the mood swings and hot flashes. My husband calls Clomid the devil pill so we are both not really looking forward to me starting them. I am now a SAHM so I don't have the insurance I use to have and my DH's insurance doesn't cover a single drop of anything when it comes to infertility coverage so Clomid is the cheapest way and my fertility specialist thought it would be worth a try seeing as though I have always been a poor ovulator. So, that is where we stand right now. I am not sure if Clomid will work for us since it didn't work years ago, but I am definitely holding out hope and keeping the FAITH. I guess a part of me thinks that since I have been pregnant before then perhaps I could get pregnant a bit easier this time around. I am probably kidding myself, but I am still trying my best to stay positive and hope for the best. I know Cameron would be a GREAT big brother!! He is truly just the sweetest little boy that I have ever seen and so well behaved......ok, well at least most of the time (lol). I remember when I was going through all of this before we got pregnant with Cameron and we went through test after test and fertility treatment after fertility treatment and I thought to myself that I would never get pregnant. I went through an emotional roller coaster every single day and it was so hard. I guess having Cameron makes things a bit easier this time around. We are hoping for Baby #2, but if it doesn't happen on Clomid then I will just continue to thank my lucky stars that we have our little miracle Cameron. Anyway, here is to Clomid pill #1 (UGHH). Keep us in your prayers.......

Sunday, July 27, 2008

Enjoying Time with Little Man

Shawn has been umpiring on the weekends to bring in some extra money. I get to stay home and play with Cameron and of course spend more time with him. I am so thankful that I am able to stay home with Cameron. I know that not every family is fortunate to do so, but if you have the chance I say that it is SO worth every minute of it. I have been able to see Cameron grow and learn every single day. He talks so much and I think that has alot to do with us talking with him constantly, reading and working with him. He is just so smart that it is hard to believe at times. Shawn and I joke that he is too smart for his own good. Anyway, I just thought I would let you know that it is truly amazing watching him grow and learn everyday. He does something new everyday and for me that is exciting. I just love every minute of everyday that I have with him. He is truly such a bright and shining star in my life.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

When your child says "I Wuv Ew" for the 1st Time

Cameron was up early this morning yelling "Mommy". All I wanted to do was roll back over, turn off the baby monitor and say "I get 30 more minutes." Instead Shawn went in and got Cameron and brought him to me. As I was laying there rubbing Cameron's forehead and talking to him he looked at me and said for the very first time "I Wuv Ew". It was so cute and definitely a moment to remember forever. We had been working on it with him, but today he put it all together and said it all on his own. He then proceeded to roll on to his side and put his arm around my arm and then he said "awwww". I do that alot when he gives me a kiss or a hug out of the blue. Anyway, it is a short post, but something I had to share with all of you. Definitely started my day off GREAT!!

Friday, July 18, 2008

Little Hands & Little Feet

Cameron loves Mickey Mouse and I normally record Mickey Mouse Clubhouse everyday for him. Well, I decided this morning that we would snuggle up on the recliner and watch it together while eating a morning snack. We were sitting there watching the show and I couldn't help, but to watch him and look at how big he has grown in such a short time. Where does the time go? It seems like yesterday when we found out we were pregnant, in the delvivery room, being taken in for a c-section and then having our little boy. He was holding my hand this morning and I couldn't help, but to look at his hands and feet. They use to be so small, they fit in the palm of my hand and well now he wears a size 5 shoe. Watch out!! He still very much loves his feet.... it was funny because I remember every single time we would go in for an ultrasound he would ALWAYS have his feet in the picture. It was like he was showing them off or something and they were so cute. I just love his little piggie toes. I made some molds of his feet when he was alot smaller and wasn't moving as much (6 months) and thought I would share some pictures with you. Where does the time go? Enjoy every minute with your little ones as they grow fast and get big!!

Thursday, July 17, 2008

It Can Happen!!

I have noticed that alot of folks are looking at my blog. First of all, I guess you are either looking at my blog because you saw my story on NBC4, you are currently going through infertility yourself, you know someone going through infertility or you are just kinda curious about my site. Whatever the case might be, let me just say "Thank You for stopping by". I am thrilled that I have had so many visits to my site, but more importantly that I have hit a chord with so many couples out there that have gone through or are currently going through infertilty. My main reason for doing the story was to let everyone out there know that miracles do happen and our little Cameron is proof of that. Infertility comes in all different stories and over the next couple months I am hoping to share some more miracle stories with everyone of you that comes to visit my site. If I could say a few things to those couples that are currently dealing with infertility it would be this..... Don't Give Up On Your Dream Of Becoming A Parent!! It will happen and you just have to find it in yourself to stay strong, positive and most importantly to KEEP THE FAITH and NEVER GIVE UP HOPE!!

I know that when I was going through IVF that it helped tremendously to have a support system. I had a great friend that I worked with that went through the same thing, but unfortunately had to go through IVF more then once. She now has twin boys and if my memory serves me correctly they are turning 6 or 7. I also have another dear friend that just recently went through IVF more then once and finally got pregnant after the 4 time around and is due to have her baby in August. So, there are so many wonderful stories to share and hopefully I can share them all with you. Stay Tuned!!

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Cameron loves corn on the cob.

We had grilled chicken breast tonight and corn on the cob for dinner. Well, Cameron loves corn on the cob. He gets so excited and smiles and squeals when he sees it. He looked at me tonight after eating some of it and said "Nummy Num Mommy". It was so cute and of course I had to take a picture. Wow, I can't believe how big my little boy is. He is growing too fast and sometimes I would just like to pause everything. Anyway, enjoy the picture. I thought it was a cute one!!

Waiting Patiently.....

Well, we are still waiting to start Clomid. My cycles have not been normal at all and well once again this month they are not. I was a couple weeks late last month and it looks like we might be on the same schedule this month (oh bother). So, I just sit and wait and wonder when AF might decide to arrive. I have been on medroxyprogesterone to help regulate my cycles and when I went in to see Dr. Williams he mentioned once again that I have never been a great ovulator so I guess that is my problem when it comes to infertility. So, I will continue to twiddle my fingers and wait for that moment when I start and then from there I will start Clomid on Day 3 of my cycle.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Doctor Appt with Steve Williams - Trying for BABY #2

Well, we are once again dealing with infertility. We had hoped that we wouldn't have to deal with this after having Cameron, but once again we are faced with this emotional roller coaster. I guess it seems to be a bit easier to deal with now that we have Cameron, but we would still love to add another little blessing to our family. We went to see Dr. Williams on Tuesday. We sat down with him to firm up a game plan. Seeing as though I am a SAHM and we no longer have my insurance coverage it kinda makes the plan pretty simple. No infertility coverage and we are down to 1 income makes it pretty simple. We decided to try Clomid again seeing as though I have ALWAYS been a poor ovulator. Dr. Williams said that appears to be my problem with infertility. So, we start Clomid again on day 3 of my cycle which should be right around the corner. I am not sure what I think about going back on Clomid. I know that I was a royal pain in the tushie to live with and we were so happy to be off that medication when it was all over and done with. So, from here we will try that for 3-6 months and see what happens. If it doesn't work then we will just sit back and relax and enjoy our every single day with Cameron. He brings enough joy and happiness to my everyday so I am sure that at the end of this if we aren't pregnant then it will be easy to cope with. So, here goes nothing....... let's try for BABY #2.
Wish us luck!!!!! Thanks for everyones continued prayers.....

4th of July 2008

He loved the sparklers......

I love this close-up

I love this close-up of Cameron. His eyes are so beautiful.....simply perfect in my eyes!!

I love this photo edit

If I held a star for every time you made me smile, I'd be holding the galaxy in my hands.

I love his smile here


Splish Splash Cameron is Taking a Bath

He loves playing in the water. He enjoys bath-time so much that he screams when he has to get out.

He loves this snake that we got for him at the zoo.

He likes to wear the snake as a necklace...... YIKES!!

How Handsome

He is just so handsome here.

Walk Time

He loves going for a walk. I just love how blue his eyes are in this picture and his 2 little teeth. My happy boy!!

Daddy & Cameron's fingers

What a precious picture......

My bellycast that I made at 9 months

It was definitely an experience making one of these. A messy project, but worth it. I will cherish it forever and currently have it hanging up in our bedroom.

Cameron visiting his grandparents while camping

Wasn't he just too cute in this jacket. He enjoyed going to visit his grandparents at the camp-site, but the wind took his breath away and still to this day it does.

1st Trip to the Zoo

We took Cameron to the zoo and he enjoyed it. He liked seeing the animals, but loved the machines that set off misty water. To this day he still loves the water!!

I love this picture

Our 3 hands..... look how small his is against ours. How precious!!

Mommy & Cameron

He is always so happy..... I can't say it enough how truly blessed we are.

A Photo Edit that a friend of mine did for me.

A friend of mine made this photo edit for me. This was shortly before I learned how to do them myself. I just loved his giggly smile here.

Picture taken on 3/18/2007

He is growing up fast..... he just loves bath time!!

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

DR. STEVE WILLIAMS - Our Fertility Specialist

Here is a picture of Cameron being held by Dr. Steve Williams taken in February 2007. I had to go in and see Dr. Williams and of course show him our little miracle. I was so proud to show him off that day. I am always so happy to show him off any day. I am such a proud Mommy!!

Cameron & Mommy

Here is Cameron snuggling with Mommy. I don't think I let him out of my site at all once he was born and still to this day have a hard time doing that. I just love having him with me all the time. Truly my little blessing and my buddy!!

First Family Picture

Here is a picture of the 3 of us for the first time. WOW, what a happy family. We are truly blessed with our miracle and are blessed by God everyday to have him in our lives!!

Our Little IVF Miracle

Cameron was born on January 6, 2007 at 2:49 am. he weighed 7 lbs 3.3 oz and was 20 inches long. He was just the cutest little thing. I had a c-section due to me being in labor for 31 hours and not going anywhere from there. I wasn't sure what to think about the c-section idea, but I was pretty ready to see our little guy. We had waited for him for so long already and we didn't want to wait any longer. Cameron Gregory James was so precious when they put him into my arms for the first time. He looked into my eyes and I couldn't help, but to cry. I instantly had to touch his face to make sure it was all real and I whispered to him "I love you". Here is a picture of the first moment that I got to see him and hold him. A moment to ALWAYS remember and cherish.

Pregnant and Loving It

WOW, I loved being pregnant. I loved everything about it including having 24/7 morning sickness. I was literally sick ALL THE TIME. It wasn't morning sickness, but all day and night sickness. I am not a thin gal by any means and when I found out I was pregnant and could wear maternity clothes and say I was pregnant......well, I loved it!!

I lost weight in the beginning of my pregnancy and at the end only gained a total of 13 pounds. I was thrilled beyond belief and so happy to be pregnant. Here is a picture of me 9 months pregnant.

HCG Levels

I went in for blood draws every couple days to make sure that my HCG levels were going up. If they continue to go up then the pregnancy continues to grow. Here were my levels......

May 10, 2006 - 59
May 12, 2006 - 154
May 15, 2006 - 289
May 17, 2006 - 561
May 19, 2006 - 1216
May 26, 2006 - Our first ultrasound

Our first ultrasound showed that our little Cameron was definitely in the right spot. No more ectopic pregnancies and we finally got to see our little Lima Bean..... Mommy & Daddy's baby lima. Here is a picture of our first u/s.

May 10, 2006 - It is finally POSITIVE!!

I was waiting for the call all day after going in for bloodwork that morning. I couldn't concentrate at work and I was so nervous all day long. The call came in around 1:10 pm and the nurse told me that my beta was positive. My HCG level was 59 and I was thrilled. Tears were streaming down my face and my dream of finally becoming pregnant was coming true. I hung up the phone and instantly called Shawn. He is a school teacher so I had to interrupt class, but it was so worth it. He was nervous and ready for the bad news..... little did he know that I was going to give him GOOD NEWS. He was so excited and all we could do was cry on the phone with one another. We were so happy and couldn't wait to get home to each other. WOW, in the end it only took that 1 little embryo to stick..... our little Cameron. It is kinda funny looking back on this day, but I had seen so many negative hpt's that I had to see for myself that this was indeed a POSITIVE. I went to the grocery store and bought a hpt and came home and tested it for myself. It was indeed POSITIVE. Goodness, I never thought that I would have seen a POSITIVE hpt. Look for yourself (YAY, HIP HIP HORRAY). It is finally positive and we are thrilled.

Our last Embryo

Our last embryo didn't divide anymore so unfortunately it was not viable to freeze. What a disappointment. We were hoping to be able to freeze that little embryo to give us some hope while we waited, but we were holding out hope that just 1 of those embryos would stick and we would become pregnant. That was our last hope, no more insurance coverage and fresh out of money. We prayed night and day and day and night. Waited for that call......

Game Plan - Step 3 IVF (In-vitro Fertilization)

Well, the IUI didn't work and I knew that I wasn't going to give up quite yet especially since I had "SOME" insurance coverage through the company that I worked for so we moved forward with IVF. We went to counseling as a part of the ART program. We were setup for injection classes to learn all about the meds and how to inject them. We ordered the meds ( around $4000 worth). I started an antibiotic as well as my dear hubby. Shortly after that I started birth control, Lupron, Menopur, Gonal F and the list goes on. I was doing pretty good with the shots in my stomach, but experienced frequent cramping.....all normal due to the progress of the follicles (eggs). Every other day or couple days I would go in for blood draws, internal ultrasounds to check the progress of everything. Everything was looking good and I was given instructions on when to take the trigger meds (Ovidrel). I took the shot in the evening and then had my egg retreival the next day. I was given a shot in the tushie to help me relax and take the edge off and then they started the retreival. They got 13 eggs and the next day I was told that only 10 of them fertilized. It was touch and go for days. I would receive calls from the lab on how my little embryos were doing and of course we only wanted good news. Every day there were 1 or 2 embryos drop off and not divide into more cells and therfore not be viable. We were set for day 5 transfer. The day I went in for the transfer I was told what we had to work with..... we had 3 embryos left out of 13 eggs. I thought to myself...... how in the world can that be possible? I had 13 freaking eggs and now we are down to 3 embryos? That was crazy, but they helped you understand. Shawn and I decided to transfer all 3, but the doctor (Dr. Freidman) told us that he thought 2 would be ok. He wanted to leave one of the embryos alone to see if it would divide into more cells and be possible for freezing. So, we transferred 2 embryos that day. We were so, we just sit and wait and wait and sit.

Game Plan - Step 2 (Intrauterine Insemination)

Well, the clomid didn't work. So, we decided to move on to step 2. IUI (Instrauterine Insemination). We tried that 2 times and we didn't have any luck with that either. Wow, what a disappointment. I continued to keep the faith and try my best to stay positive.

The Game Plan

Well, we decided to start the game plan and the first step was Clomid. I was ready for anything. I was going to start off running and I was ready and so energetic!! He prescribed Clomid for me. I started that and never really had any side effects except for moodiness. WOW, was I ever moody. My husband was ready to either walk out or choke me (kidding), but he was quite frustrated. I definitely turned into someone that I was not and I noticed it. I was evil one minute and crying the next. I knew that I was ready to get off this awful medicine, but stuck it out for 6 months. My dear husband stood by my side through it all. He is such a saint!!

Seeking Help after a year of trying

We spoke with my gynecologist about not having any luck with conceiving. It had been over a year and we had no luck at all. He referred us to Dr. Williams at Ohio Reproductive Medicine in Columbus, Ohio. What a nice guy!! They were so understanding and compassionate about what we were going through and there to help. We started with bloodwork and lots of it and a HSG which is a test where they inject dye into your fallopian tubes or in my case fallopian tube. Unfortunately, when I had my emergency surgery in Feb 2004 they had to remove my right tube. The results came back and there were no blockages so we were able to move forward from there with the gameplan. We were so excited!!

Month after Month

Month after Month we tried to conceive. We never knew that getting pregnant could be such a hard job. It was indeed a 24/7 job or at least that is what we thought. We tried everything in the book...... I tried standing on my head for a few minutes thinking that would help, we tried different positions and well nothing worked.

February 25, 2004

I woke up in the morning to get ready for work. I was cramping something AWFUL. I decided to try to pull myself together and got up to shower, use the restroom and get ready for work. Well, I used the restroom and that was as far as I got. I was really hurting from the pain in my right side. It was a pain that I had never experienced before. I decided to lay back down and called off from work that day. Shortly after that I couldn't take the pain anymore and thought for sure that I was having a miscarriage or something else was terribly wrong. I called my doctor here in town and they told me to come on in and they would check things out. I got there and they got me right in. My blood pressure was extremely high and I was in horrible pain. They did an internal ultrasound only to find that I was indeed pregnant, but it was an ectopic pregnancy. I was rushed in for EMERGENCY surgery. My doctor told me not to go home, but go directly to the hospital. The tears wouldn't stop falling..... the baby that we were so happy to be pregnant with would soon be taken from us. I got to the hospital and they rushed me back to get changed. It was all in about 10-15 minutes and I was soon off to the operating room. I remember saying good-bye to my husband, kissing him and apologizing to him for what was about to happen. My doctor would try to talk to me and I couldn't say a thing because of the crying. I was not only in pain, but I was already experiencing such a great loss, the loss of our first child. I remember them putting the mask over my face and waking up in my room shortly after. I woke up, got sick and remembered how numb I was after everything that happened. I see young women (girls, young girls) get pregnant and not take care of their kids. I see parents have kid after kid and sometimes take them for granted, I see abuse and it hurts me to the core. All I wanted was our baby back...... for things to be normal, for me to be normal. It was indeed a day that I won't ever forget. Here is a picture of a plaque that we put in our flower garden. It helps us to always remember the child that we lost on this day.

February 22, 2004

I was due to go to the doctors for my annual pap smear. I told my husband on the way home from church that I was going to take a hpt because I felt as though I might be pregnant. I just had a feeling...... hard to describe, but just a feeling.

I took the test and it came back positive. We were ecstatic and felt totally blessed that we were expecting our first child. WOW, I had always wanted to be a Mom and my dreams were finally going to come true. We shared the news with our family and they were of course thrilled!!

November 14, 2003

Shawn and I got married on the evening of November 14, 2003. We were setup on a blind date through mutual friends. We couldn't be happier to finally be together. We are like two peas in a pod and are totally in love. We knew from the beginning that we wanted kids, but weren't quite sure when to start our family. I guess we pretty much just thought that if and when we got pregnant would be such a blessing and then that was the time we would start our family.