Secondary Infertility

It is funny to hear someone say "Once you have been pregnant you should be able to get pregnant again right away." Well, that isn't the case with me. Most people believe that once you've had one child, you've proven yourself to be fertile and therefore will have no problems conceiving again in the future. Unfortunately, this is not true. Secondary infertility is a very common problem. Secondary infertility accounts for more then 60% of infertility cases which when you think about it, it is very sad to hear. You would think that since I have been pregnant 2 times previously that I wouldn't have any problems getting pregnant again. I should be fertile myrtle - right? Well, unfortunately that is not the case with me. We lost a child in 2004 due to an ectopic pregnancy and that is when all of my infertility problems started. We were so blessed after we got pregnant through IVF and our son was born on January 6, 2007, but I still to this day experience the heartache of infertility. Dealing with infertility is very hard for me. I see myself as failing in this area of my life and it breaks my heart. Getting pregnant shouldn't be this hard, but it still continues to be a battle with me and it isn't a battle that I can win. I was so hoping and praying that once I had Cameron that it would be simple for me to conceive again, but I had a feeling deep down that if I got pregnant through IVF then that would be the only way we could conceive again. Well, it looks like I was right in my assumption.

When you are younger all you really think about is getting married and having children. I remember playing with my dolls as a young girl and pretending as though I was the perfect Mommy. It was something that I always knew I wanted. I was the girl that loved babysitting as a teenager. I truly loved kids and still to this day enjoy being around children. I guess there is just something inside me that has always wanted to be a Mom. You look at your parents and in my house growing up, I always had a sister to play with. We may not have been the best of buddies, but we still had one another to play with and that is what sticks out in my mind. I would love for Cameron to have a brother or sister. I see him as being "The Best Big Brother" that anyone could ask for. He is such a sweet and caring little boy and I wish we could give him a brother or sister. After this month we decided not to go with another round of Clomid and when I sit here and think about my decision.... I am so thankful that we decided to go that route. This month has been an awful month for me. My cycle has been so long and my cramping has been awful. Normally, I only experience cramping during the first day or two of my cycle, but not this month. I am now on day 6 of my cycle and I am STILL experiencing cramping which is very unusual for me. I feel like I have been through the ringer this month. I am exhausted, spent and I am so worn out with the cramping that I could scream. I don't recall my cramping being this bad when I was on Clomid before. Hopefully my body will start to unwind soon and get back to normal..... what is normal?

I also want to take a minute to say "Thank you" to all of the gals that have posted comments on my blog or have taken the time to send me an e-mail. It is great to have the support and always great to hear other stories on infertility. When you hear from others (friends or people that have been through infertility themselves) it tends to bring some calmness and peace to your day so THANK YOU AGAIN!! It is always great hearing from others!!