Today is a day to Remember and Reflect. If you lost a child then you probably know about today being Pregnancy and Infant Loss Rememberance Day!! I remember Feb 25, 2004 like it was yesterday. A very hard day that I sometimes wish I could just forget, but then I think that if I forget about it then I would forget the picture of our sweet baby who was growing in my right fallopian tube. It was so strange to see my doctor keep swirling around that right tube during the ultrasound, I knew that was our baby, but I knew the picture that I was seeing on the monitor looked totally different from what it should look like. Well, after I had my ultrasound on the 22nd followed up by bloodwork and awful cramping and bleeding on the morning of the 25th, I was rushed in for emergency surgery. It was a whirlwind of emotions and uncontrollable crying. I literally don't think I stopped crying until I was fast asleep and going through my surgery. Little did I know that I was 3 months along. It was hard to grasp and so hard to go on, but I made it through.
I dealt with years of infertility after our loss and finally in January 2007, we were blessed with a little boy by the name of Cameron. God has richly blessed us and I couldn't be happier to have such a special little boy to share our lives with. He is a miracle and I must say that I am so happy that IVF worked for us! I don't really know why things happen, but after doing some major soul searching, I have come to realize that things happen for a reason and we just need to trust in God. I was always the type of person to take the wheel and try to control certain things in my life, but as I was going through IVF, I realized that I just need to give it all to God and let him take the reigns and when I did that, things fell into place and we were blessed with wonderful news!! We were pregnant and after so many years, we were so ready to hear that news!
So, today on this day, I will take a moment to light a candle at 7:00 pm in rememberance of our child that we lost and the many other men and women that lost their children as well. Can you picture what Heaven looks like with all of those precious children dancing around? Wow, I bet that is a beautiful sight!!